Worry

Is there an imaginary cut off period when offspring become accountable for their own actions? Is there some wonderful moment when parents can become detached spectators in the lives of their children and shrug, 'It's their life,' and feel nothing?

When I was in my twenties, I stood in a hospital corridor waiting for doctors to put a few stitches in my son's head and I asked, 'When do you stop worrying?' The nurse said, 'When they get out of the accident stage..' My parents just smiled faintly and said nothing.

When I was in my thirties, I sat on a little chair in a classroom and heard how one of my children talked incessantly, disrupted the class, and was headed for a career making license plates. As if to read my mind, a teacher said, 'Don't worry, they all go through this stage and then you can sit back, relax and enjoy them.' My parents just smiled faintly and said nothing.

When I was in my forties, I spent a lifetime waiting for the phone to ring, the cars to come home, the front door to open. A friend said, 'They're trying to find themselves. 'Don't worry! In a few years, they'll be adults. 'They'll be off on their own, they'll be out of your hair'. My parents just smiled faintly and said nothing.

By the time I was 50, I was sick and tired of being vulnerable. I was still worrying over my children, but there was a new wrinkle. Even though they were on their own I continued to anguish over their failures, be tormented by their frustrations and absorbed in their disappointments..and there was nothing I could do about it. My parents just smiled faintly and said nothing.

My friends said that when my kids got married I could stop worrying and lead my own life. I wanted to believe that, but I was haunted by my parent's warm smiles and their occasional, 'You look pale. Are you all right' ? 'Call me the minute you get home'. Are you depressed about something?' My friends said that when I became a Grandparent that I would get to enjoy the happy little voices yelling "Grandma! Papa!", but now I find that I worry just as much about the little kids as the big ones.

How can anyone cope with all this worry? Can it be that parents are sentenced to a lifetime of worry? Is concern for one another handed down like a torch to blaze the trail of human frailties and the fears of the unknown? Is concern a curse or is it a virtue that elevates us to the highest form of earthly creation?

Recently, one of my own children became quite irritable saying to me, 'Where were you? I've been calling for 3 days, and no one answered I was worried.' I smiled a warm smile.


God Is Good.....

BUT, then there's the whole issue of reversing roles and raising your parents and worrying over them....but that's a different story for another day...

I made it through allergy testing (so many allergies it's going to take 3 or 4 injections per visit, which are twice a week for a month and then once a week and spirals down for 5 years until my system is immune to the allergens....run on sentence?) and upper and lower GI with out any problems.

Now to change the mood and just because I'm feeling daring and my DD told me too, I proceed with a short commentary....

Exactly what other way would one want their condoms???

This has bugged me since the day these places went into business! First of all why did they ever move out of the pharmacy shelves (I'm sure they're still there but you know what I mean?) or men's restrooms at gas stations or wherever else they are or have been.

I guess it's just a nicer (did I really say that?) way to promote or name a sex shop? I've never actually been in one, but I assume they don't sell just condoms?

GIVE ME A BREAK~~

My heart goes out to the poor parents that have to explain these things to their children at way too young of an age.

Monday

There is something about Monday mornings I just hate. I'm usually a Pollyanna, glass almost full kind of gal, but Monday's bum me out.

Well, it's really Sunday afternoon when it starts and it's been that way since school days when I was young. The routines of Sunday night as a child just put the dread in motion.

Now when the kids were young and I was a somewhat Stay at Home Mom it was a little different...."YEAH!!!!!!!!!, the kids are back in school." But considering the spacing of my children it was FIFTEEN years before they were all in school at the same time!

It's just hard to imagine a time of retirement of getting up when you want and doing what you want and not having the obligations I have now, or that dread that tomorrow is MONDaY!

But as time continues to go by it does seem that those obligations are less or I'm finally figuring out they aren't as crucial as I thought they were....all but that earning the almighty dollar part...

Well, this week is starting off with a BANG as this afternoon I have a full round of allergy testing and tomorrow I'm spending the day at the hospital having an upper and lower scopes done. (that's putting it nicely...not medically) Since both parents were taken by cancer and polyps seem to be a fad in my family I must surmise every 5th year to this joy. If I could just get my siblings to get their head out of the sand and take care of their medical business I would be a woman at peace. Oh well!

Have a happy week! and TGIM!

Your Civic Duty

Today when you sit down to work on your calendar for this week....

Don't forget to set aside some time to do your "Civic Duty"

Funny thing. I voted on Friday on my lunch break and when I returned to work (with my Taco Bueno bag in hand), a co-worker said something to the effect of "where have you been" and I stated "doing my Civic Duty" and he said "Going to Taco Bueno???" rather confused. Upon further investigation it appears the phrase is unknown among the "younger" crowd.

Yes, I went around the office asking people what "Your Civic Duty" meant!

And it was about half and half as far as the answer of voting... a few said "Jury duty?" And some said some incredibly funny things...things I can't repeat!

(I just realized all the signs are pointing left except the last one...that in no way is a reflection on my vote... )

I honestly didn't even scratch the surface on photos of the the "VOTE" signs. None of the pictures are duplicates and I didn't take pictures of all of them.

And here I was worried I wouldn't be able to figure out where to place my vote, locate the poll, find the place to do my civic duty!

There really was a steady stream of people going in to vote....great turn out. Makes you wonder if there will be anyone left after the early voting...

Here I am standing (well, you can't see me I'm the one taking the picture! Wish you could I'm really decked out in my red, white and blue with all the bells and whistles. A jacket with Uncle Sam on the back and a shirt with a big American flag on the front. Oh, and don't forget my sparkly red shoes! DON'T WORRY I'm kidding!) Did you notice the woman behind the table her mouth is wide open. (it's hard to see since the photo is small) You'd think that was T.O. in front of me...but it wasn't....at least I don't think it was.

Well, that's it folks. My vote has been cast for another four years. May the best man win. And my hope is that people are voting not to make history....though it's going to be made anyway you look at it. It also seems that this election has brought people to the polls that have never voted before or cared to vote. And that I suppose would be a good thing?!

Jiminy Cricket

Jiminy may be small, but he's far from your average cricket. He can turn an umbrella into a parachute and looks great in a top hat and spats, and he carries a mean tune, as well as a nearly inexhaustible supply of home-brewed common sense. It's no wonder he is chosen by the Blue Fairy to be Pinocchio's "official" conscience. Unfortunately for Jiminy, it's only after he blushingly agrees to his appointment as "Lord High Keeper of the Knowledge of Right and Wrong, Counselor in Moments of Temptation, and Guide along the Straight and Narrow Path," that he realizes what a job he's gotten himself into. Like any conscience, Jiminy is occasionally late on the job, and frequently ignored even when he is around. Fortunately, Jiminy is nothing if not persistent, and he eventually succeeds in steering Pinocchio back to the right path.

Well, this little guy isn't even a cricket but that's who he reminded me of....Good ole Jiminy Cricket the one little Disney character that I learned the hideous facts of life from. Did anyone else WAY back in the 60's go through that horror?? It was at school in about the 4th or 5th grade and they took all the girls into the cafeteria and all the boys into the gym and showed us this cartoon (starring no less than Jiminy Cricket) telling us the basic facts of life. So that's what I think of when I think of poor Jiminy...

Not that he was the conscience for Pinocchio or had a lovely little two step. I think of the birds and the bees! Well, Jiminy Cricket here's to you and the grasshopper that reminded me of you riding on my side mirror at the farm the other day. Quite a handsome fellow and note the jack ass in the back ground. He's really making progress. Have a great week!